Thank God I'm Back in the USA!

Okay... so technically I didn't leave the USA but I can easily argue that I left civilization. While on a business trip, I had the grave misfortune of spending time in the hell mouth known as Herndon, Virginia near scenic Dulles Airport.

The hotel was lovely, I somehow accidentally signed up for a King Executive Suite that overlooked the soccer field where the mens team from San Juan or Guatemala  or some other place I couldn't locate on a map were practicing. I had to use a card key to get to my floor which I couldn't figure out the first time and had to use the fire exit to get to my room. If that hadn't worked I probably would have been on the 10 o'clock news as a jumper because I would sooner scale a building than ask for help from the concierge desk. 

The trip was miserable but here are some of the highlights of area: 

- the tap water tastes like a dirty creek

- English is a second language

- there is indoor smoking EVERYWHERE 

- there are 50 cent tolls everywhere, I went to McDonalds down the road and had to pay one

- when I signed my hotel bill I'm almost positive I also swore loyalty to God and Country

 I debated kissing the ground when I got home but I thought that would be excessive. 

Oh, Maryland My Maryland, I never knew how much I loved thee. 

2:^)