Well Ain't Life Just A Bowl of Cherries... I Fuckin' Hate Cherries

I have a friend who is currently working at a camp on Catalina Island in California and every few weeks she sends all of us an update on how she's fairing. To set the tone for one of her emails think fairies and unicorns dancing on a rainbow bridge over a chocolate river, and this is pretty much the mindset that my dear friend inhabits 24/7. Some may think she's just a happy go lucky person, I just think she's mentally ill. I don't know how I managed to live with her for a year, but we get along pretty well even though I am what some may call a black hole of human despair.

A few days ago we received the latest installment, which was entitled, "Sunny days are here to stay". Uggh... already I was cringing, but after reading a bit into it, it would appear that all is not well in the world of gum drop rainfalls and licorice roads (okay I'm done with the cutesy imagery). A dark cloud had cast itself over the isle of Catalina in the form of a young camper. She began, "The older kids are cooler then I could have ever imagined and they have inspired me and at the same time made me question whether or not I was in the right profession. One day out of the past 21 really stands out in my mind..." And what pray tell was this soul crushing experience that nearly pushed her to the brink and made her reevaluate her life?

It turns out that one particularly "tough" camper who she "didn't connect with until the 2nd to last day of class" had the audacity to say to her "its not my [fault] that you're an angry biologist that doesn't get paid anything". Oh snap! And get this, he had said it in such a condescending way that she was so deeply hurt she had to go windsurfing to work out her pain! When that didn't work she went to her supervisor who goes by the name... Butterkup... oh lord... okay I swallowed the vomit, and she talked to her about her troubled student. Butterkup went and gave the boy a stern talking to, while my friend went repelling off a pier with some fellow counselors in order to talk out how to handle the situation.

Then comes one of those early 90s sitcom moments when the music gets all sappy and people start hugging, which explains why the email is so aptly titled "Sunny days are here to stay".

It turns out the child had spoken to his parents and told them he wanted to be a marine biologist, and they asked him, "Why would you want to do that you won't make any money?" The child later apologized to my friend and they were finally able to bond together and become close friends.

The End.

Now see, if I were in that situation I would have maybe brought up the point that my biology degree allowed me to move across the country to a beautiful island where I've got my own bungalow and all I do is jump off piers and windsurf all day, but maybe that's just me. Actually if it was me, I would have laid such a hurt down on that little prepubescent that his children would be emotionally traumatized by the verbal beat down he received from me. I mean come ON already. I have never and will never understand people that let others disrespect them like that and get away with it, but I'm also mouthy and too stupid to know when to keep my mouth shut so maybe I'm not capable of comprehending big ideas like forgiveness and social graces. Still that little runt would rue the day. Mark my words.

But seriously if that is the roughest thing my friend has had to endure in her life in Catalina I would hate to see her have to teach at an inner city classroom. Her head would probably just up and explode.

...and ladybugs and butterflies would come flying out. (I know I said I'd stop but I just couldn't help myself).

2 days down 3 to go until the Freakin' Weekend!

2:^)